It is not a big deal that my children eat fruits and vegetables, though it used to be. I remember how my eldest daughter was as a toddler. Her nanny would run after her holding out a spoon just to feed her. It was always an ordeal. You will never guess that this same daughter of mine, now 10 years old eats any kind of salad as an appetizer.
When we migrated here last year, the recurring complaint that I would hear from my husband who was forced to be a stay-at-home dad is the difficulty of feeding my 4-year old daughter. She is so picky with her food and is such a purist. "I just cooked spaghetti with meatballs and she refused to eat it! She only ate the pasta with cheese." You don't mess her food with a lot of sauce. She can eat plain rice. My husband has resigned to giving her "wet hotdog" for lunch just to relieve himself of the stress of meal preparation. Truly, it is easier to open a can of vienna sausage knowing that she would eat it without question. Even when dining out, her order is a no-brainer. Macaroni and cheese and she's good to go. That's how picky she was, until lately. I noticed the gradual turn-around. Then I realized that my eldest daughter had the same transformation years ago too.
And I think this is how it happened.
Even though she was always picky and predictable with her food taste, we never gave up on offering her new food to try. At first it was such a struggle. When she sees her plate with food that is not to her conditioned liking, she would immediately say no. And the scenario would be the same. I would get a spoonful and put it near her mouth saying, "Try it first before you say no!" However, if my youngest daughter has made up her mind about the food , she would just clamp her mouth close and shake her head until I grow tired and simply remove the food from her plate and get her what she wants. She will sometimes console me with a remark like, "Don't worry mommy, I ate fruit earlier." Then a couple of months ago, she had modified her response. She was not as firm as before. After the initial no and shake of the head, she'd later open her mouth. Then she'd spit out the food. So I had to change her plate and get her usual staple food. Weeks ago, she was now more amenable and would chew a couple of spoonfuls then later on shake her head. Then just last week, when I was preparing a salad of halved grapes and sliced cucumber crunchers (the smaller variety of cucumber) and busy mixing it with sour cream, whipped cream, salt and pepper, she came near and asked, "What are you doing mommy? Can I help?" I gave her the mixing spoon and allowed her to do some messy mixing. "Can I taste?" she asked. I raised my eyebrows, surprised that she was even interested in eating it. When she tasted it, she asked for some more and some more. So I placed some on her breakfast plate beside her pancake. And she finished it with her pancake. The next thing I know it has become her favorite.
A couple of nights ago, I spooned out mixed vegetables on her plate without asking her. She ate it without a question. Then today, as I placed beef steak on her plate and a couple of onions, she asked for more onions on her serving. Now I can see that she may just have outgrown food pickiness. So was it just a stage then? Did my persistence pay?
According to Dr. Jean Mercer, a developmental pyschologist, there is indeed a stage in a child's life when she is pickier than the other children of different age group. "Toddlers and preschoolers are often 'picky', especially in contrast to their voracious and fairly indiscriminate appetites in their first months." She relates this to the growth spurts that happens in different stages in a child's life. The greater the growth spurt in a developmental stage as in infancy and adolescence, the less picky the children are. During childhood, food adversity may not be permanent as we sometimes believe. So it is good to continue offering a variety of foods to the kids so they do not grow up to be picky eaters. It also turned out that food pickiness of the mother may be handed down to a breast-fed baby because apparently the taste of the food that the mother eats while breastfeeding is passed on to the baby feeding on her breasts. The baby then becomes accustomed only to the food that the mother eats. Offering a healthy food that the mother herself is averse to might become a frustrating struggle between the mother and the child.
Well, at least I know that my children will never be averse to malunggay leaves, squash and green beans because that was my staple food while I was breastfeeding. I never realized that the benefit would extend beyond the breastfeeding years.
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